Thursday, July 30, 2009

When do You Give Up on Utopia?


Most days, lately, I feel trapped between my optimistic childlike self and my slightly more realistic adult self. In thinking about making a move to WA in 2010, I'm left, again, with the realization that I will never have everything all in one geographic location.
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My Utopia would be a place where my family, close friends, good employment, romantic potentials and breathtaking nature are all together. It would also have ample cultural resources in close proximity and a healthy dose of classic architecture and history. (In fact, if you want to get into the details, it would also have wide streets, park-like medians, sidewalks and bike paths abounding). That place will never exist, but I think I'm just beginning to come to terms with that.
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I know,... I know... you're wondering why this is a big deal to me. You've likely realized such things long ago. Don't get me wrong. I'm very blessed. And, no matter where I've been, I've had elements of my Utopia. A little piece of me has been holding on to the belief that at some point, though, all of those elements would come in line.
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I'm sure Facebook is to blame for some of these feelings, too. Reconnecting with old friends can be eye-opening. Two friends from high school have children of their own entering high school this year. Old roommates are on their third child. Taking a look at other lives makes me more aware that I've been living in some sort of parallel universe during the years we've been apart.
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As I type this, I'm watching a show on PBS about a modest income family who sails on their 25 boat all around the world with their two kids. Playing with puffins, touching an iceberg, watching the moon rise over the ocean and daydreaming while watching glowing phosphorescence under the water in the middle of the night.... kind of tempting. I loved a quote during it, "when we measure our lives by possessions, we miss who we truly are."
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What would be in your Utopia? Or, if you already live in your Utopia, what makes it so?
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3 comments:

M said...

This is a very timely post for me. I think about this all the time as well. The downside of traveling and living other places is you are never able to find everything you want in one place again. It's a small down-side compared to the benefits, but still.

I think the physical place you describe does exist, probably in many locations. It's the fact that everyone we love will likely never be in the place that we live that taints that feeling of Utopia and keeps our hearts longing.

Maybe this is why Heaven is such an appealing concept--everything you could want, with everyone you love, including Heavenly Father and Jesus. It's the ultimate Home.

Mamma Meg said...

I do understand what you mean. No, I have not found my Utopia. Even though I have kids etc., that fact in itself seems to make the list of needs in my Utopia even longer. I now worry about the schools, the religious support system, the crime...all different things that I did not really care too much about when I was single or even when my kids were younger.

This is also a timely post for me. We have just decided, after trying for years to stay in Utah, Idaho etc. that in order to do what we need in life, we will have to look farther away. Much farther away. I have done so much to try and stay close to family or close to the "base" of our church, but in doing so I have learned a huge lesson.

For me, I will have to make my own Utopia. I'll find good things about the place I live, ways to stay close to family, develop stronger family and internal religious beliefs. Everyone has different situations, of course, but for us, Utopia has to be limited to the walls of our home. Everything else changes too often. The only thing we can control is what happens in our homes, or how we deal with it.

Globe Trecker said...

"When we measure our lives by possessions, we miss who we truly are."

That is absolutely spot on! I admire the people who do things like this. They seem to take their own version of Utopia with them, creating a life within it as they go. Utopia is more about people and experiences rather than things. However, nice architecture, town/city planning, great weather, landscapes and access to nature are what make a place desirable for me to live. Add family and close friends to that mix, and well, it would be Utopia. Yet I agree with Marnie that we will all likely never be in the same place. S does Utopia exist? I think that may be setting a pretty high bar. I think the ultimate Utopia is what heaven is for:)

But for now, I am creating memories and experiences that my husband and I will take with us as we develop a keener vision of what the ideal (Utopia) really is to us. Elements from here and there, if you will. I also don't know if can discover what your Utopia is without exploring the world around you, as it would be difficult to find Utopia if you don't travel outside your backyard and see what is out there to compare and contrast. I have always been pleasantly surprised when living in different states/countries that there are wonderful elements of Utopia in all places.